A Sudden Sweet Shot of Joy [Life]

I recently had an unexpected delay at the airport and bought a paperback novel to pass the time. It has been a long time since I have been able to satisfy my thirst for good fiction. I usually go to the library and comb the new book shelves for first-time authors. I have found many gems that way. So the book I chose, In the Woods by Tana French, is an Edgars Award winner for best first novel. At the end of the 4th chapter I found the following:

“Out of absolutely nowhere I felt a sudden sweet shot of joy, piercing and distilled as the jolt I imagine heroin users get when the fix hits the vein. It was my partner bracing herself on her hands as she slid fluidly off the desk, it was the neat, practiced movement of flipping my notebook shut one handed, it was my superintendent wriggling into his suit jacket and covertly checking his shoulder for dandruff, it was the garishly lit office with a stack of maker-labeled case files sagging in the corner and even rubbing up against the window. It was the realization, all over again, that this was real and it was my life.”

This was one of the best descriptions I have ever read of what it is like when you are fully present and in-the-moment. You see everything clearly, without the inner voice of judgment. You don’t have all the mind chatter about what else you really should be doing right now. This was not only a rare moment for the character in this book; it is a rare moment for all of us.

When I start to work with clients I often ask them to think of a “peak moment” in their life. You can try it too. Think of a time when you were totally and completely present. Fully awake to what was going on around you such that you can really recreate that moment (and I am literally talking abut a moment—not the summer when or the day that…) in all its details, using all your senses. Really, stop reading and think of a time…

The next step is to figure out why this moment called you out of your usual stuck-in-the-musings-of your-mind place and woke you up. Usually, it is because in that moment you were fully honoring your values. When my clients tell me these stories, we look for what was important to them about the moment and begin to name and clarify the values that really resonate with them. The character in my novel really valued partnership, familiarity, and a well defined task. It is when he stops acting in accordance with those values that things really go awry for him.

And that is the next place for you to look, too. Take a look at the values that stood out in your peak moment. Don’t worry if they are “socially acceptable” or “popular” or don’t fit into one neat word like love or family. Now look at the way you are leading your life today. On a scale of 1-10, how well are you honoring those values now? What would be different if you could shift just one troublesome area from honoring your values at a 4 to honoring them at an 8?